Intro

• We don’t like to change our minds!
  • Once we accept a story, we do t question it
  • Rely on habits, assumptions, instincts
  • Act of reconsidering, building mental flexibility → valuable
• In this book... 1) how to open our own minds, 2) how to encourage others to think again, 3) how to create communities of lifelong learners

Part I: Individual Rethinking

• Mindsets we take wrt our perspectives:

  • Preacher → when our sacred beliefs are in jeopardy, deliver “sermons” to protect & promote ideaks
  • Prosecutor → when we recognize flaws in others’ reasoning, marshal arguments to prove them wrong
  • Politician → when seeking to win over an audience, campaign for approval of constituents
  • These all prevent us from thinking in the mode of a scientist, undertaking more systematic analysis & experimentation

• The smarter you are, the worse you fail at analyzing patterns that contradict your views

  • Confirmation bias, desirability bias, the “I’m not biased” bias (guilty...)

• Thinking like a scientist requires being actively open-minded rather than reactive: hypothesis-generating/data-driven, not hypothesis-confirming

  • Only common trait among successful and creative artists, scientists, politicians, etc. = cognitive flexibility, intellectual curiosity, openness
  • Rethinking cycle: intellectual humility → doubt → curiosity → discovery →

• How to find the sweet spot of confidence between being an armchair quarterback and an imposter?

  • Dunning-Kruger effect: competence and confidence are inversely related (except when you know literally nothing about a topic, confidence is usually low)

  Arrogance is ignorance plus conviction. While humility is a permeable filter that absorbs life experience and converts it into knowledge and wisdom, arrogance is a rubber shield that life experience simply bounces off of. — Tim Urban

  • Humility from Latin roots meaning from the earth— about being grounded, recognizing that we are flawed and fallible → goal is confident humility
  • Usually better to err on the side of doubt: possible benefits of imposter syndrome → motivation to work harder and to work smarter, to continually seek knowledge/learning

• How can we find joy in being wrong?

  • Murray Davis → ideas survive bc they’re interesting, bc they challenge weakly held opinions, induce us to be curious and open up. But, when a core belief is questioned, totalitarian ego is activated → we shut down (“protector” parts?)
  • (His descriptions of students having their personal worldview annihilated and finding it fun reminds me of the exhilaration I feel after a hard interview or test, or even learning a completely new, better way to think about a topic or problem in working on)
  • Detachment is key: 1) detaching your present from past, and 2) detaching your opinions from your identity
    • Base your identity on values instead of opinions
  • Difference between good and great forecasters is how often they update their predictions (just a small shift, from 2 to 4 rethinking cycles!)
  • Counter confirmation bias by actively looking for evidence that proves you wrong

• Working in teams:

  • Low relationship conflict (personal/emotional issues) & moderate task conflict (re: ideas & opinions) → optimal performance
  • We want to work with people with dissimilar traits and backgrounds, but similar principles and values (diversity of ideas for shared commitment)
  • Important to work with “disagreeable” people (a challenge network) go activate rethinking, but be careful not to let task conflict spill over into relationship conflict
  • Frame disputes as debates rather than disagreements
  • Most effective to focus on how your idea will work than argue over why— also reveals limits of understanding

Interpersonal Rethinking: Opening Other People’s Minds

• How can we convince other people to rethink their ideas?
  • More skilled negotiators 1) identify areas of agreement/common ground, 2) ask (curious) questions (allows insights to come from the other person themselves), 3) don’t get into offensive/defensive spirals, 4) offer fewer reasons (stick with a few strong ones), 5) comment in their feelings & test their understanding of other side’s feelings
  • Most effective to communicate your POV with moderate level of confidence
• Why do people form stereotypes about rival groups, and what does it take to get them to rethink them?
  • Identifying with a group satisfies needs for belonging and status
  • Hard to shift stereotypes bc tendencies of group polarization, conformity
  • Emphasizing common humanity, building empathy with individual from other group not enough to overcome group stereotypes...
  • What can work? Contemplating the arbitrariness of one’s animosity, engaging in counterfactual thinking: explore origins of your own beliefs, reflect on how diff circumstances (eg. of birth) → diff beliefs; intergroup contact (the power of conversation)
• Motivation interviewing to get people to change their minds (alt. to persuading, which can make their beliefs stronger)
  • Goal = be a guide to help someone find their own motivation to change through 1) asking open-ended questions, 2) engaging in reflective listening, 3) affirming the person’s desire & ability to change, 4) summarizing to check for understanding
  • Be curious about the other person’s beliefs, make sure it’s clear the decision is up to them
  • Instead of commanding or recommending, say something like, “Here are some things that have helped me— do you think any of them might work for you?”
  • Listen for a shift from sustain talk (commentary about status quo) to change talk (about desire, need, ability to adjust) and steer convo from there
  • Important to not use this manipulatively— backfires when attempts to influence are detected!
  • Power of listening (of having inverse charisma) → display of respect and care, offers our most scarce and precious gift: attention

Part III: Collective Rethinking

• Binary bias: human tendency to simplify complex continuums into two categories → polarization problem, why just knowing there’s an alternative opinion doesn’t help people find common ground

  • Antidote = complexifying by showcasing a range of perspectives

  ...it takes a multitude of views to help people realize that they too contain multitudes.

  When conflict is cliché, complexity is breaking news. — Amanda Ripley

  • Ex. Wide range of beliefs exist about climate change, not just activists vs deniers; important to distinguish the latter from skeptics, who do update their thinking as they get new information
  • Including caveats and contingencies also conveys complexity
  • Talk about when a certain claim is true rather than whether it is true
  • Perspective-taking isn’t actually that effective in polarized discussions, bc we can actually read minds... instead, try perspective-seeking (talk to people!)
  • Binary bias also applies to emotion → allowing mixed emotions can help you understand complex situations & relationships

• How can the way we teach foster the skill of rethinking?

  • Teaching kids (& others) to be better fact-checkers by 1) interrogating info instead of just consuming it, 2) rejecting rank and popularity as proxies for reliability, 3) understanding that sender of info may not be its source
  • Lecturing → sometimes preferred by students over more active learning methods, but proven to be less effective; doesn’t allow student to learn to think or question by themselves
  • Embrace confusion when faced with complex problems (and don’t try to rescue others immediately from the feeling) → responding to confusion with curiosity & interest = hallmark of an open mind
  • Engage in critique of your own and others’ work (not the person)

• Rethinking as a collective capability, dependent on an organization’s culture

  • Psychological safety (trusting your peers, being able to admit to mistakes, okay with taking risks, etc.) → foundation of learning cultures (vs performance cultures)
  • People in power showing vulnerability → fosters open communication, two-way feedback
  • Process accountability → always explaining why you’re doing something a certain way, not relying on best practices jusy because → actually builds psych safety; builds challenge network
  • Separation of decision makers and decision evaluators = important for unbiased data

Conclusion

• Too much grit → can get locked into our beliefs or plans (ex. for our career) → identity foreclosure
• Important to continually reevaluate relationships, too— what your expectations are of each other